1. BREAKING DELUSIONS

A young woman from Waterford spent a long while telling me that, by the end of her first-ever day in the province, she had had all her delusions about Northern Ireland shattered. She had spent the day being bussed around Belfast, in conversations with people from both sides of the peace lines, and in exercises at Corrymeela designed to help her think herself into their situations and become aware of her own ignorance so as to challenge and begin to change it. I understood her experience entirely, because it has been mine, too. I still can't claim any special knowledge of, or insight into the Northern Ireland situation but I can certainly say that my time there has broken the delusions about the place and its people which I've gathered through forty years of exposure to English media coverage.

2. RECOGNISING THE REALITY OF SECTARIANISM IN SOCIETY, CHURCH, AND ME

A middle-aged mother from North Belfast told me that her 17-year-old son had just moved to Liverpool. His prime reason for moving here was not to study, she said, not to work, though he's aiming to be doing those things as he gets settled. Rather, he had been given a choice also faced by many of his peers - the paramilitaries had told him that he either 'signs up' with them or, for his own good, he'd better disappear.

Stories like that family's illustrate the angle on sectarianism which the media have concentrated on for so long, and it is terribly real still today. But I have become aware of the subtler strains of sectarianism which 'polite society' promotes often without realising it. Such as what Liechty/Clegg call 'benign apartheid', which is where clergy concentrate on their own people to the extent that they have no time to explore dialogue / partnership with the others around them.

And I have also had my awareness heightened of the attitudes I carry around within me - often to do with avoidance of conflict, a passivity which can feed the promotion of sectarianism and other sorts of -isms, which may be unseen but are no less real for that. All of these layers of sectarianism need challenging and changing, and the obvious observation is that while political involvement is essential the best and perhaps hardest place to begin is with me.

3. LEARNING FROM THOSE INVOLVED IN MOVING BEYOND SECTARIANISM

Fortunately many others before me have worked through these challenges and Northern Ireland contains a wealth of experience in all sectors of society, which is now being 'exported' into other areas, for example Mediation NI staff currently helping facilitate community reconciliation forums in racially-divided Oldham, and the work of TIDES Training in Kosova and with Bosnian Serb and Muslim students.

I could have come home with a case full of excellent training materials from these and other agencies which will help me to realise in the future the aim to embark on 'peace education' and learn with others locally about community relations and conflict management. I shall pick up on them as I continue moving along this road.

Meanwhile I also learned that much of the good practice I've learned in youth and community work applies in this field - for instance, it was affirming to see familiar 'cooperative games' and discussion-starters being used at Corrymeela, and to be on the 'receiving end' of some of them in sessions which developed my own insights into my own harmful attitudes and also into methods of moving beyond them.

4. REFLECTING THEOLOGICALLY ON MOVING BEYOND SECTARIANISM

It was timely to be at Corrymeela in a month which featured two sets of gatherings which enabled theological reflection on issues around reconciliation. James Alison brings a whole new language to theology, one which attempts to sideline the language of violence, sacrifice, 'atonement', and is working on a new language based on the fascinating, if difficult, concepts of Rene Girard about our being trapped in a cycle of scapegoating 'others' so as to keep our group identity, a cycle which we can only break if we put ourselves in the scapegoats' position (the Christ position); about our cultivating 'disinterestedness' in the 'group' (church structures, for instance) so as to achieve a pure and freeing relationship with the 'other other' (God). It is a provocative theology of peace and reconciliation and a beginning for me.

The Ecumenical Spirituality weekend involved representatives of many Christian communities involved in reconciliation who shared stories and deep insights, many from years of struggle with the issues only starting to be opened up for me. I keenly await the paper from facilitator Cecilia Clegg; meanwhile my own notes on the weekend suggest that a spirituality of reconciliation would contain elements of:
Hospitality and welcome - as provided so well by Corrymeela Community staff and members;

Use of creative space and time - as enabled for us by the venue (a beautiful, light, imaginative building) and the programme;

Symbolism - using new symbols as well as old which speak powerfully to our need of reconciliation, and offer indicators towards it - such as the tremendously powerful symbol of 443-445 Springfield Road, Belfast, home of the Cornerstone Community, which physically straddles a 'peace wall' so that people wanting to move easily between the two communities can call at one door and walk through the house to exit the opposite way;

Active Listening - an essential foundation for reconciliation to have a hope;

Openness to other spiritualities - a positive dialogue and two-way exchange of all that is good between Christianity and other traditions, while remaining rooted in the Christian faith;

Story-sharing - people sharing honestly their distinctive life-stories, conflict-stories, spirit-stories, making themselves vulnerable in the telling, open up new avenues for dialogue and depth.
5. BUILDING ON MY STRENGTHS IN THIS AREA WHILE WORKING AT WEAKNESSES

My final reflection is a recognition of what worked well for me on this placement and in which areas I was personally challenged. The latter would include my own 'conflict profile' which indicates that by nature I tend towards being a conflict-avoider rather than a confronter or joint problem solver, and my own personal and structural involvement in the system of sectarianism. The former is around good practice in cooperative group work and in creative worship designed to affirm and build community relations.

Alison, James, Raising Abel (New York: Crossroad, 1996)

Cassidy, Eoin G, McKeown, Donal, Morrow, John (eds), Belfast: Faith in the City (Dublin: Veritas, 2001)

City vol 6, no 2, July 2002, including various articles on the city in Irish culture

Falconer, Alan D, Liechty, Joseph (eds), Reconciling Memories (Dublin: Columba Press, 1998)

Fisher, Simon et al (eds), Working with Conflict - Skills and Strategies for Action (London: Zed Books, 2000)

Kaptein, Roel, Morrow, Duncan, Girard, Rene (introduction), On the Way of Freedom   (Belfast: Queen's University, 1993)

Lederach, John Paul, Building Peace - Sustainable Reconcilition in Divided Societies (Washington, DC: United States Institute for Peace, 1997)

Liechty, Joseph, Clegg, Cecelia, Moving Beyond Sectarianism (Dublin: Columba Press, 2001)

McCann, Eamonn, Dear God - the price of religion in Ireland (London: Bookmarks, 1999)

National Peace Council, Northern Ireland Working Group, Northern Ireland: Roots of Conflict, Routes to Peace (London: National Peace Council, 1999)

Sheppard, David, Steps Along Hope Street (London: Hodder and Stoughton, 2002)

Soundings issue 18, Summer / Autumn 2001, A Very British Affair

Walsh, Ben, The Struggle for Peace in Northern Ireland (London: John Murray Publishers, 1999)